|Let’s Go to Prison||Vapid and hilarious in an Idiocracy kinda’ way. Great twist. Prepare to be woo-ed.|
|No Country for Old Men||Fuckin’ fantastic. Erin hated the ending. I loved it.|
|Cloverfield||Great monster flick.|
|Gone Baby Gone||Yeah. Didn’t see that coming. Still, though… tried too hard to be clever.|
|3:10 to Yuma||Erin hated the ending. I thought it was awesome. Claire’s suicidal, bi-curious boyfriend from “Six Feet Under” is such a dirt-bag in this film; he’s great.|
|The Simpsons Movie||Not bad, but quite preachy. I was disappointed.|
|Coach Carter||Hoosiers + Dangerous Minds. Based on real events… all 3… is life really this uplifting and trite?|
|Hustle & Flow||According to my sources, it’s hard out there for a flesh-peddler.|
|Slither||A film bereft of any redeeming quality. Wholly entertaining.|
|The Sentinel||This is nothing like the creepy 1977 film of the same title in which Ellen Griswold sports a leotard, and masturbates on a couch.|
|The Kingdom||Foxx (not Redd) was better as The Hard-Ass in Jarhead. This film is thin on verisimilitude (guess who has a thesaurus!), but it’s fucking brutal… even if it plays against common sense and bolsters The Average American’s islamophobia.|
Brutal film. Erin cringed multiple times. Convincing performances, and Naomi Watts didn’t suck. Only downside: I’ve now seen Viggo Mortensen’s cock and balls enough for three lifetimes.
I’m a big fan of Jeremy Piven, but this movie could have been a hell of a lot better. The plot is unoriginal, and the “twist” is revealed way too soon. Lots of shooting, though.
In which your host reviews films with 4-letter titles.
|Juno||The premise isn’t new, but the characters’ dialogue alone is sharp and witty enough to make it seem so. Genuinely laughed many times. Sweet and funny and everything else that Dan in Real Life wishes it was.|
|Fido||Awesome premise with great performances. Tons of subtle humor (both political and social) the masses may miss. Approaches tedious at times, thankfully for brief periods.|
|Cars||Cute as hell, but predictable.|