Overheard in iChat: Part 7

Me: Tonight is Murder Night.

Gregg: um OK

Me: Intended victim: Invasive mulberry bush.

Me: I’ve already cut the motherfucker down twice.

Gregg: BURN IT

Me: I need to at least appear to attempt to save the one next to it (which it appears to be strangling).

Gregg: BURN IT ANYWAY, AND HOLD A TEARY PRESS CONFERENCE ABOUT COLLATERAL DAMAGE AND YOUR TOTAL COMMITMENT TO MINIMIZE CIVILIAN CASUALTIES.

Gregg: Then blame a mid-level officer and get on with life.

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