Slimy Marketing

The latest press release from SCO (via Slashdot) only perpetuates the worldwide, usually accurate, perception that People in Marketing are Slimy.

“This [undisclosed] Fortune 500 company recognizes the importance of paying for SCO’s intellectual property that is found in Linux and can now run Linux in their environment under a legitimate license from SCO. We anticipate this being the first of many licensees that will properly compensate SCO for our intellectual property.”


First off, the copywriters suck. I’m not on the job right now, so I’ll speak in sentence fragments, because I can. Missed a comma. Used “we” and “our” in a press release (idjits). Mentioned the company’s name (or acronym) three times in two slimy sentences? Jeez, Louise.

Yeah, I’m in marketing. Yeah, I write press releases for our company. But I’m not a slimeball, as far as I can see. My shit’s pretty much cut-and-dry facts about an awarded contract, with the focus on our systems’ capabilities, or our company’s support structure. There’s little to no spin, and an amazing lack of slime. See for yourself: eighty (80) press releases or blurbs that I’ve written during my career at ASTi.

It’s a “niche market”, so don’t be put off by shit you’re not familiar with… my point is purely stylistic.

My press releases are lucky to get the company name (or acronym) mentioned once a paragraph (but always the lead-in, of course ;). Only when press releases or news blurbs are subject to prime-contractor or DoD approval does ‘ASTi’ appear in consecutive sentences. Is that a testament to my inability to write an effective press release? Maybe, but I don’t think so. The editors and copywriters for industry publications know exactly who it comes from, and they’ll manipulate my copy as they see fit anyway.

I guess I’m lucky that I don’t work in an industry where my press releases are re-vomitted verbatim into the public eye. Then again, the underlying (and overarching) raison d’etre of ASTi is integrity, performance, and–above all–ethics.

That SCO’s weak-ass, anonymous, press releases even garner (international?) interest is a testament to their lack of… integrity… performance… and, dare I say?… ethics.